Friday, January 7, 2011

Is it a crime if I blow up my kitchen slightly on purpose?

I like to think of myself as an earth friendly kind of girl. I don't dye my hair, I save clothes from one child to the next, my thermostat is set at sixty downstairs during the day, fifty at night, and upstairs stays completely off till bed time.

These things are not simply because I'm cheap.

I promise. Well, not completely because I'm cheap. We recycle. We freecycle. We do our part to keep our trash put out minimal. I try not to use harmful chemicals. I'm a big fan of vinegar and Burt's bees-not together of course.

I swear to God, I'm going to drop an atom bomb on my kitchen.

It's inhabited by strange, stretchy, acrobatic mice. The little bastards are effing cute as hell. And gross. And... scampery. Yes. I'm aware that's not a word. But it should be. It should be a word to describe the little monsters that appear to be performing circus acrobatics on their trek to the Land Behind My Stove.

That's MY STOVE. You. Little. Bastards.

I swear, I honestly swear, I'm so freaking serious, I will buy poison if I see one more. One more cute, fuzzy, icky, stretchy, gotta-be-mutated freakish little mouse dude.

I will buy poison, and screw the earth.



Lots of Fun with My FaMiLy said...

ROTFLMAO!! I can unfortunately relate to this post :( We bought an 100+ yr old house and can't seem to figure out how the icky lil buggers are getting in. Just when we think we got rid of them I start spying a new HAVE to find their nest. Yesterday my man came home with a earth friendly contraption that look's like it belongs on Jeff Foxworthy's list "You might be a Redneck IF..." but the men he works with swear it's works like a charm. It is a nail bucket(1gallon) with a little ramp screwed to it leading to a Peanut butter smeared pop bottle on a spindle. I guess the idea is the mouse climbs the ramp in search for the PB steps out on the bottle and spins itself into water (or anti-freeze :o ) and drowns. I honestly have to post a picture so you can fully get the gist of it.
check out my blog and I'll try to post a picture this weekend.

Good LUCK!!

lovinangels said...

Ugh! Drowned stretchy freakishly cute little mouse dudes? Yeah, that's still got to be better than accidentally poisoning my dog or my neighbors tabby! Sign me up!

Lots of Fun with My FaMiLy said...