So, who is Valentine's Day for, anyway?

It's that time of year, girls...

You start thinking about Valentine's day plans. Flowers, chocolates, dinner by candlelight, dinner and dancing. The day after stories are almost always tainted by the one sobbing woman whose significant other didn't do anything for her, or whose gift was so ill received that she wonders if he even "knows her."

I'm not entirely sure what that means.

Let's face it, girls, 99 percent of the planning for this thing falls on us. And the one percent of you that aren't doing the planning? You're taking a heavy gamble. Really. Men don't care about Hallmark holidays.

They aren't waiting around, breathless and hopeful, envisioning the thoughtful effort that went into your gift. They aren't hoping to gasp with surprise and delight.

They want an effing cheeseburger, and sex. Maybe not in that order. They probably do NOT EVEN expect a card.

And if you buy one? Don't expect it to be held in a place of honor. They've read it. They've absorbed the message. Can you have sex now?

Steak would be good. Candlelight is optional, less clothes on you is better. So why do we eternally expect more effort out of them than they expect out of us?

It's just not right. Or maybe it's okay...but it shouldn't be a deal breaker. Especially those of you who are heading into a new relationship, what he does for Valentine's day is not indicative to how much he cares about you, how successful your relationship is, or whether or not you are going to get married.

If he does almost anything, anything at all...it should be regarded as success and promise in the relationship. It means he thinks you're worth braving the mall for.

I'm not entirely sure what came first, the romantic ideal, or the romance novel, but regular, every day guys don't swoon. They don't show their love with giant bouquets of roses one day a year...they do it by changing your oil. By being reliable.

I guess, what I'm trying to say is, Valentine's day is really Women's day. So, if you have something you expect from your guy, the best thing to do is clue him in. Don't hold your breath and hope...it's just not fair.